balance
i found an article which i really liked and shared it on my twitterville…and i’ll share it here..
but before that..
the early parts of my career when i was younger, had been manic and was characterised by late nights at the office and silly things like taking leave to get away but ended up doing more work. oh,it sounded silly..but i was glad i was ‘free’ from much commitments to devote so much of myself then…and from there i learnt more about myself. there were other parts as well which were just as manic even after i have a family. last year was manic. and sometimes i wonder how i dealt with somethings (i think i just looked tired a lot of times). to tell the truth, i wasnt totally miserable everytime when i was so manic with work. i had good people to work with and i could still find meaning and joy in my work.
“Work is an experience through which much of life’s rewards and opportunities for service can be realized,” he says. “Creating value for the world, for the next generation, all our high-minded ideals — much of work has the potential for giving voice to that sort of aspiration. And most executives are passionate about what they do.
“So if people are fulfilled through their work, why do we question that?”
i know though how one can get burnt out. so, i talked with some of my friends about balance, and a few of us think it is pretty difficult to seek a balance. we could, we could try…but i think it’s hard to be really good a something when one wants to be balanced. trying hard to balance, we end up with guilt trips especially when we have more than one role to fulfill. i feel at times being pulled at different directions. wanting to do more at work, to put an extra more hour..or sometimes, i know i dont have a choice but have to put in the extra hours..and at the same time i want to spend more time to coach my son, or simply to relax and play with him.
maybe we should just embrace the imbalance. if we can figure out the times when we can have some imbalance, it could be the secret to longevity and staying power..and perhaps contentment. imbalance means doing things that we believe in and devoting our energy and resources to it and being really good at it…at the expense of the other parts of our life. if we think it is worth it, it is worth the imbalance.
“Instead of trying to balance all of our commitments and passions at any one time, let’s acknowledge that anything important, and anything done well, demands our full investment. At some times, it may be a demanding child or an unhappy spouse, and the office will suffer. At others, it may be winning the McWhorter account, and child and spouse will have to fend for themselves. Only over time can we really balance a portfolio of diverse experiences.”
i read about this in a book i read some years ago, and i thought it was crap and a ludicrous idea. why, we can try to balance it all and have it all?
fortunately someone at work has sort of shown me to it and inspired me to think of balancing things out between few chapters of my life.
this idea is explained here ;
“Balance, for what the word is worth, then becomes a lifelong quest — balance among chapters rather than within each chapter. “It gets in people’s heads that the ultimate goal is a 50-50 split between work and life,” says work-life consultant Cali Williams Yost. “But there are times when I’ve happily devoted 80% of my time to work — and other times when I couldn’t.” The tough part is recognizing the chapters for what they are — just temporary episodes that together make up a coherent and satisfying whole”
Consider it an exercise in continuous redesign, in adapting to ever-changing circumstances and priorities. For couples, this also requires constant rebalancing of roles and responsibilities: You got the promotion, so I’ll telecommute for now — until my next big opportunity comes up. Those who succeed, says Zelman, are “the people who learn to dance with change, who create and ride the wave.” They don’t make decisions once or twice, but all the time.
And here’s what’s crucial: With each decision, these people invest themselves, their passion, and their time in what is most important to them. They also agree to give up something important; a portfolio life doesn’t excuse them from the need to make trade-offs. The decision to reject the mirage of balance requires the discipline to continually prioritize and compromise.
Is that balance? Only in the sense that, over time, things more or less balance out. But that doesn’t make it perfect, or easy. In some ways, it’s counterinstinctual. It forces us to think differently about our careers and about the contributions we make in all realms of our lives. And it gives us a plan that’s valid only until the next baby, project deadline, layoff, or illness.
But all things considered, it could prove a lot saner.
“
more on BalanceisBunk.
Nice one Is. I was just about to write on something I learn about balance and focus in aikido I learnt just now and it’s applicable to life when I read this post of yours.
Heh .. now I think I must think some more before I pen things down
But as Karate Kid’s (oh i so had a crush on him in the 80s haha) Sensei Miyagi said.. ‘Danial-san, everything in life there must be a balance”
heee
do share your perspective on it n from the Akido point of view.
it’s not easy to embrace this imbalance actually with a “i want it all” mentality. it can be really hard. and as mentioned, its counter-instinctual and we have to constantly remind ourself what is more important.